I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
