So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
