she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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