sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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