I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
