Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
