There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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