if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
