and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I am naked and annoyed.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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