what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Randomize
