My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Randomize
