I think im going to throw up on grandma
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
