I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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