My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
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