NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize
