Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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