I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
