You're my little dorito
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
wow bdsm is so cute
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
