we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
