talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize