ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Randomize