Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
