If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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