Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I'm really busy with my period
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