You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
Randomize