the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
