I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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