She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I need water and some morals
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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