Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize