Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
