Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
