dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Panties = found
Randomize
