Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
