Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
