I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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