idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
