During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
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