I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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