wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
