what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Randomize
