Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
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