it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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