Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
