were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Terrible idea I love it
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
