I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Panties = found
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
