So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
