Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
The uberlube is also flammable
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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