Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
