Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize