Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Randomize
