why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
