the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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